Специален поздрав за всички метъли :-)

[stefan_gorchilov@overgas.bg]

This is the situation: There is a beautiful
princess trapped in a castle guarded by a
dragon. Here is the end of the story with
different kind of metalheads as knights.

* POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white
unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the
princess and makes love to her in an enchanted
forest.

* THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon,
saves the princess and fucks her.

* HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills
the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the
princess.

FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends
playing acordions, violins, flutes and many
more weird instruments, the dragon falls
asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all
leave........ without the princess.

* VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills
the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the
dragon and eats it, rapes the princess
to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle
before leaving.

* DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon,
fucks the princess and kills her, then
leaves.

* BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills
the dragon and impales it in front of the
castle. Then he sodomizes the princess,
drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her.
Then he impales the princess next to the
dragon.

* GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon
and spreads his guts in front of the castle,
fucks the princess and kills her. Then
he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly
and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass
for the third time, burns the corpse and
fucks it for the last time.

* DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size
of the dragon and thinks he could never beat
him, then he gets depressed and commits
suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess
as dessert. That's the end of the sad
story.

* PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar
and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills
himself out of boredom. The protagonist
arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another
solo with all the techniques and tunes
he learned in the last year of the conservatory.
The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY
METAL' protagonist.

* GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs
at the guy's appearance and lets him enter.
He steals the princess' make up and tries
to paint the castle in a beautiful pink
colour.

* NU METAL
The protagonist arrives in a run down
Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but
he burns to death when his moronic baggy
clothes catch fire.